Eve Rounds

crying on the phone with casey a bcbs rep

accessing my vision, mobility and life saving drug is a greater challenge than the MS itself.

ONE .5mg pill / day

forever

or until

it is no longer effective

meaning

i’ve had a relapse.

CRY

gilenya has been my very high maintenance friend since the end of 22shots. with a 65% hope of preventing further brain body damage “gia” currently costs over 90 THOUSAND DOLLARS  a year. according to my speciality pharmacy alliancewalgreensprimerx – whatever the fuck they call themselves now.

5 YEARS … CALL HOLD FAX CALL CALL CALL CALL HOLD HOLD TRACK CALL HOLD HOLD HOLD HOLD TRANSFER HOLD CALL FAX SIGN WAIVE PRIVACY FAX CALL HOLD HOLD HOLD GIVEUP CALL CALL SUBMIT CALL CALL HOLD HOLD HOLD HOLD HOLD HOLD HOLD HOLD CRY

i pay for health insurance. i eat obnoxiously healthy. i runbikeclimbtrain danceatweddings. and still                                                                                                                                                                            CRY

i don’t even know

how long it’s been. haven’t been counting days haven’t counted backwards on the calendar. haven’t bothered to reread my own words. haven’t been missing you

the five senses

your blue eyes and crooked lippy smile which i inherited that tiny soft bristle brush for your basically bald head the white corvette a campfire cards

love

what did falling in love feel like to you actual falling a new winter sweater a blood flutter did you question its science or were you

noise

sometimes the wind the waves muffle and drown my memories sometimes the wind the waves magnify and amplify the sound of your voice and clearing

the theatre

this is  a silent film flickering  catching  starting over emptiness surrounding such a blinding contrast ahead of us shared stories  captured images disconnected nonsensical we

Twins

It isn’t easy being a twin.   Others considered us as one two-part person,  while our parents saw,  in our conspiring, four or more.